38 Years of Marriage: Charly Boy’s Wife Speaks On The Ups and Downs
Babalola Osogbiye, recently had
an enlightening interview with the wife of Charly Boy, Lady Diane Oputa,
that reveals the ups and downs of the marriage life of the couple and
how they have been able to pull through 38years. I read this interview,
which I learnt from and employ you to read too. There are underlying
lessons. Read below and share:
38yrs seems like forever in comparison to the life span of the average celebrity marriage. How have you managed?
I have been able to manage very well
because of the man I got married to. Charles is a strong family man, a
decent gentleman who puts his family first before anything else. He has
been a wonderful husband, a good father and a wonderful son to his
parents. Charles is the husband every woman dreams about. He is
sensitive, he listens, the first to apologize if he is wrong. I love his
never say die spirit. I think we were ordained by God to marry each
other because we both want the same thing, we are both committed to our
marriage. Like they say, it takes two to tango. However our marriage has
not been a bed of roses, we have our issues and challenges, but because
we are best of friends, because we are loyal to our commitment we
always resolve whatever issue that comes up, to move forward. We don’t
have a perfect marriage, no such thing in this world, but we have a
friendship that has endured through time. It has been a long journey
and we have had ups and downs within the 38years that we have been
together. But we are happy together. A lot of couples haven’t got that
far-we are really privileged. I thank God.
What has been the hard part of your union? The things that made you mad.
In the beginning it was the women, my
gosh! Women everywhere. Charles is a charmer. He had 7kids from his away
matches and the women he married that didn’t work out, before we got
married. His stubbornness was sometimes obnoxious. During his hay days
as a performer, his acts were sometimes so overboard that I will refuse
doing his background vocals and we always argued/quarreled about that.
But as the years rolled by I found ways of calming him down, and curing
my high blood pressure. I later found out that the women were more for
his hypes and pons, like the charly’s virgins. One thing I knew from the
beginning was that my husband always wanted to be a family man, after
all he grew up seeing both parents together for sixty something years
before papa passed on. Much later the women thing totally fizzled out.
In the beginning I wasn’t too sure how to deal with all his children
from deferent women, but trust charles he knows how to put his family
together. That’s how I overnight became a mother of 9 children plus my
last three. The only thing that he still does that pisses me off
till tomorrow is his silence, when he is angry about something. He will
lock himself in his room and may not talk to me for days. I can’t deal
with that because we talk all the time our communication is on point. He
always says he doesn’t want to say the wrong things when he is angry.
Otherwise, Charles is the best thing to happen to me and I thank God for
that.
Why do you think celebrities marriages have short life span?
Celebs marriages are not different from
any other marriage, however, the bottom-line is that both parties have
to know what they want from the start. For most young people it’s about
the packaging and never the content. Marriage is about two people who
want to stay married no matter the weather, if one person wants it more
than the other it won’t work. The ingredients for a fairly decent
marriage, will be mutual respect, good communication between the couples
and good friendship. Thank God that today what we have most, is old
fashion friendship. My husband is not your typical Nigerian person,
above all he listens and he is very sensitive to how I am feeling as my
friend and it’s all mutual.
Has your trust for him ever wobbled?
Yes, in the beginning the first maybe
8yrs, too many drama that I was dealing with. It wasn’t easy at all but I
also matured along the way. I began to see things for what they really
are not for what it looked like. Experience has thought me how to
separate the boy Charly from my man Charles. Charly is an incorrigible
botton pusher and that will never stop, but my man Charles is also an
incorrigible introvert and that’s who I married. A few times he has
reported himself to me and he is not good at lying. BEING FULFILLED IN
MARRIAGE IS GUARANTEED WHEN YOUR SPOUSE IS SUPPORTIVE, UNDERSTANDING AND
SENSITIVE TO YOUR FEELINGS AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, WHEN HE IS ALWAYS
LOOKING FOR CREATIVE WAYS TO KEEP THE FIRE BURNING.
Your husband is now a marriage counselor of sort, how does he cope giving up his personal number to fans who have marriage problems?
Yea, that’s Charlyboy for you, who else
would give their personal number on air. Do you know how many calls he
receives per minute? He however has been doing all of that for a very
long time, it’s only recently he went ballistic with that. I guess for
him, he wants to always feel useful, always wanting to teach, to share,
to give hope to the hopeless, that’s charlyboys story, aside the fact
that he likes to confuse people with his antics. Am I surprised? no. I
won’t be surprised if tomorrow he opens a church. Charles has always
been spiritual ever since I met him, very deep. That’s why for people
who meet him one on one, they are so charmed because he is nothing like
charlyboy puts out. And it takes intelligence and discipline to know the
boundaries. He has counselled and inspired millions of nigerian youths,
to be themselves, be focused and never to let anyone kill their dream. I
love him for the many lives he has touched and still touching, for all
who worked with him, they too can testify he added value to their lives.
That’s who he is.
It’s almost going to 4decades of marriage what keeps the fire burning?
Hummm!!!! Charly can be un unrepentant
romantic when he wants to be. Though he hasn’t pulled any stunt to sweep
me off my feet recently, but he can be full of surprises. The last
time, he asked me to escort him to the airport to receive a certain
business partner from the carribean. Before I knew what was happening, I
was on my way to the Bahamas, sweden and Dubai, with nothing but my
purse. He knows I love romance and from time to time he figures ways to
sweep me off my feet. That’s why we try to keep it as youthful and as
fresh as we can. We really work at it. It’s not easy but we are
determined. Charles woos me with his outlandish and elaborate stunts,
and I like it. I always look forward to my birthdays. We are like two
buddies.
Recent report says he has become more religious and has finally become born again?
Charles has always been spiritual, has
always given himself to service. He has always been an inspiration to
millions of frustrated nigerian youths. His life style has made
thousands chase their own dreams and never gave up on their selves. Yes,
people where not too sure what to make of him, because he kept
confusing people who couldn’t see the humour or the sense in how he was
putting out. He has always been about how he can add value to his
environment and the people he meets. He may not have been a regular
church goer but was a Christian by his actions. I guess the difference
now is that the press seems to be reporting more of his works and the
value he promotes than all the stunts he pulls to keep the people
guessing. But yes he is more calmer now, more at peace now and more
spiritual. Like they say, there is a time and season for everything. He
is been there done that and seen that, what else can be new for him so I
guess is Jesus time from here on and that’s all the better for him. He
is doing what God wants him to do.
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